Last week, I was at a friend’s birthday gathering at a crowded bar in D.C., and I somehow wound up in protracted conversation with a small group of people about the war in Iran.
One of them fully supported the war and fully supported Trump. I politely sipped my drink and waited for the convo to move on. I didn’t really wanna talk about this during what was meant to be a laidback evening.
But then he said this: “The death toll has been surprisingly low for our military.”
I asked him: “How do you mean?”
“Well, we’ve had a small number of troops killed, less than ten.”
“Thirteen,” I said. “Thirteen troops have been killed in combat.”
“Right,” he said. “That’s a surprisingly low number. We’ve had a low fatality rate.”
And, you know, I just couldn’t let that go. I couldn’t do it.
“Surprisingly low?”
He said: “Yeah, it could be much worse. We could have lost a lot more soldiers at this point.”
I asked him: “Can you name any of the service members who were killed?”
“What?”
“Thirteen service members have been killed. Do you know any of their names?”
There was this long, awkward pause. And then he said: “I know some of their names have been published.”
I said: “All of their names have been published. The last KIA was a few weeks ago. Do you know any of their names?”
Another long pause, and then finally: “No, I don’t.”
Let me offer some friendly advice for anyone like this gentleman who is tempted to say this was a “surprisingly low” number of service members killed.
Don’t make this observation if it’s just a number to you.
Every one of these service members had loved ones, friends, a life back home.
Some of them had kids. Some of them had mortgages and front lawns to mow. Some of them had grills in their backyard they would have been using for parties this summer with people they loved.
Their families will see an empty seat at the Thanksgiving table for the rest of their lives. There will be someone missing at every birthday, every graduation, every wedding, every birth, every holiday, every blessing, every tragedy. Always.
They’re gone, and their families and friends are always going to feel that loss.
Now, I wouldn’t be so judgy about this if the “surprisingly low” claim weren’t being used to justify Trump’s illegal, unnecessary, and disastrous military operation in Iran.
Because what they’re really saying without actually saying it is this: “Yeah, that wasn’t a great call by Trump, but it isn’t as bad as it could be.”
And that pisses me off. It really does. It makes me wish bad things for anyone who says that.
You shouldn’t be saying something like “surprisingly low” in the first place but especially when you don’t know any of their names.
Because if U.S. military fatalities in Iran are “surprisingly low,” it shouldn’t take you any time at all to learn their names.
Friendly advice.
March 1, 2026
Robert Marzan, 54, Chief Warrant Officer 3, U.S. Army
Nicole Amor, 39, Sergeant First Class, U.S. Army
Noah Tietjens, 42, Sergeant First Class, U.S. Army
Declan Coady, 20, Sergeant, U.S. Army
Jeffrey O’Brien, 45, Major, U.S. Army
Cody Khork, 35, Captain, U.S. Army
March 6, 2026
Sorffly Davius, 46, Major, U.S. Army [non-combat death]
March 8, 2026
Benjamin Pennington, 26, Sergeant, U.S. Army
March 12, 2026
John “Alex” Klinner, 33, Major, U.S. Air Force
Ariana Savino, 31, Captain, U.S. Air Force
Ashley Pruitt, 34, Technical Sergeant, U.S. Air Force
Seth Koval, 38, Captain, U.S. Air Force
Curtis Angst, 34, Captain, U.S. Air Force
Tyler Simmons, 28, Technical Sergeant, U.S. Air Force
Well said, Charlotte.
Yeah, “only” two men were killed in a 1960 Air Force training operation in Alaska.
Sadly, one was my father.
But yeah, “only” two were killed.
People need to watch their words….
Thank you, Charlotte.