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It was June of 2019, and I had no intention of supporting former vice president Joe Biden in the primary for the Democratic nomination. It wasn’t personal. Honestly, I wasn’t even considering him enough for it to be personal.
Despite the former vice president having a plurality of support among Democratic primary voters in almost every national poll that year, neither I nor any of my friends and colleagues took much notice of his candidacy beyond basic acknowledgment.
The conventional wisdom in my circles—and honestly, I think most of the political circles in D.C.—was that the man endearingly called “Uncle Joe” would likely play the role of king/queenmaker, perhaps the most coveted endorsement of anyone not named Obama.
But president? No way in hell. Not a snowball’s chance. He was too old. He was too adrift from the youth and pop culture. Too boring. Too much like the past.
It wasn’t that I didn’t like him. I knew, for instance, that it was Joe Biden who pushed the country forward on same-sex marriage before even Pres. Obama was ready to publicly take the plunge. That was to his credit and always would be. But liking ain’t enough.
That month, I traveled to Columbia, South Carolina for the presidential primary forum being hosted by Planned Parenthood. It’s bonkers to even think about now, but there were 20 (!!!) Democratic candidates who would audition before the audience that day.
Waiting in the green room, I got to meet most of the candidates as they cycled through following their interviews. I wanted to ask all of them about trans rights directly, gauging whether their support on paper would be backed up by something more tangible and resonant.
Most of the candidates were just fine. I would chat with them briefly, ask a question or two, take a pic, and it was on to the next.
One senator, who shall remain nameless, wasn’t so great. I got in line to shake their hand, and when it was my turn, I asked them a trans rights policy question, and they hastily passed me off to a red-faced staffer, who quietly apologized for the rude interaction and insisted I give her my email for a follow-up. (And she did, by the way.)
Later in the day, the former vice president came through and received an enthusiastic reception. There were so many folks waiting to talk to him that I figured I wouldn’t get the chance, but his personal aide saw me and asked if I wanted to meet him. Of course I do!
She caught him just as he was beginning to leave. “Mr. Vice President, do you have a moment?”
He turned around and walked back toward me with an unexpectedly charming intention. It was as though he had been in a hurry but now wanted to communicate with his body language that he had all the time in the world for a little chat. It was such an interesting switch.
I introduced myself, thanked him for his support of same-sex marriage in those early days in 2012, and asked my question about trans rights. While I was doing this, Mr. Biden had casually taken my hand and held it in his own between our chests like it was the most natural thing in the world. He stared intently with kind eyes. I might as well have been the only person in the room.
When I got to the trans rights question, his demeanor suddenly changed. He got very serious, his eyes sharpened, and, still holding my hand in his own, he took his other hand and pointed a finger at my chest and said:
“I am in this fight with you. Trans rights are human rights.”
He then talked with me for several minutes about trans equality, offered up a surprisingly informed policy nuance (even for him), and told me unreservedly he had our backs. He then gave me a hug. And left.
I want to point out here that I am absolutely certain that Mr. Biden perceived me as any given voter. I seriously doubt he knew about my work or my platform or anything else like that at the time. To him, I was just a voter asking a question. He still gave me a full conversation on something important to me in the middle of his busy schedule, when he assuredly had other places to go.
Ten months later, when my first choice, Sen. Elizabeth Warren, dropped out of the race, there was no question in my mind that I’d be immediately supporting Mr. Biden. None at all. That conversation changed everything.
He wasn’t my first choice. Or my second or third choice before that little chat. But of all the candidates with whom I spoke, it was Mr. Biden, by a country mile, who impressed me the most.
Yet, it’s not enough to like someone. It’s not. There are politicians whom I like quite a lot that I wouldn’t trust with the presidency. I would much rather trust a highly competent and capable politician whom I don’t like than one I like but in whom I can’t quite vouch for their competency and capability.
It’s not enough for me to simply like Mr. Biden. Given the grave and immediate threat to our democracy and the overwhelming sense of survival I have voting in this election, it’s just not enough to like him.
But I do implicitly trust Mr. Biden. I believe him to be highly competent, incredibly sharp, and in possession of an emotional intelligence that far exceeds any given capable politician. And I’ve met (and personally known) many capable, successful political leaders in my life.
I’ve watched as he has centered trans rights as an imperative in his administration. I have been consistently been touched with the way in which he has refused to back down in support of the trans community. I have watched as he’s rejected calls—many public and I assume many private—to wholly abandon the trans community.
He refuses.
I believe Mr. Biden is our best choice to win in the fall. I understand there are many who disagree with me, and that’s fine. Reasonable adults can disagree. I respect the understandable concern many have expressed.
But respectfully, Joe Biden has earned my trust, many times over, and I know, deep down, there’s no one I’d rather have fighting for me in this moment. I believe in Joe Biden, especially given how unfailingly he’s believed in me.
I don’t give a damn what political media says, particularly since their alleged craving for competency seems to largely fail in holding Donald Trump accountable on his pervasive litany of illegal and immoral failings.
Mr. Biden has made it clear he’s in this to win it, and until I hear him say otherwise, I’ll have his back. Because he’s had mine.
As a proud veteran and proud American, I support President Biden and Vice President Harris to win this. I firmly believe they will win it. After everything I've seen this week--not to mention everything before this week--I'm quite confident that if we put in the work that we did in 2020, we're gonna be just fine.
So, let’s go win this thing. Let’s do what needs to be done. Let’s put in the work and lean on each other and stand shoulder-to-shoulder in this fight.
I believe in us.
It Doesn't Matter That I Like Joe Biden